Quite simply, when you find out your pregnant, you’re going through a whole rage of emotions. I would like to think when most women find out its joyful and happy emotions, but let’s be real, depending on your circumstances it can also be a tough and thought-provoking time.
Being in my early twenties and just about graduating from Uni, my baby experience was almost non-existent, on top of this its not something I was generally thinking of and thought it will come in the future; years and years and years from now. But here I was, present moment and with my thoughts.
The only real interaction I had my whole life was more than 10 years ago when my little cousin Benjamin was born. Up until this day I remember being so excited to come home from school in hopes of my aunt bringing baby Benjamin to our house so I could play with him.
Babies were so different and mysterious, but I felt so much love for him. I just wanted to do anything to keep him happy and laughing and never wanted to hear him cry and giving him his favourite toys and snacks and it almost always did the trick.
His favourite snack were Wotsits. My mum would give me £1 for my after-school snack and growing up in east London I would go straight to the chicken shop for hot wings and chips for a pound, this was my tradition after a hard day of school, it was also a great chance to socialise with other kids from school. But knowing there was a baby at home I didn’t even mind that I will no longer be hanging out with my friends or have chips, I had to get him his Wotsits, and I would do this any time I found out he was at our house, run to the corner shop after school to give him Wotsits so he’s happy.
Is this the key to being a good parent then? Finding out what makes the baby happy and giving it to them, so they don’t cry? A big maybe. So, if that’s the case then I will do it for my own baby. I don’t know how to change nappies or what food my baby will like, but I will find out and give them whatever they want and if they are happy that’s all that will matter.
These were my initial thoughts and what gave me hope to think though I don’t have a clue about the other stuff, I will love them and get to know their needs and when I do, they will always be happy and if they are happy then so will I.
Pregnancy is an overwhelming time to say the least but if you don’t know what to do now or feeling overwhelmed with what’s to come then know this, the baby will be all yours. Other people will be around but most of the baby’s time will be spent with you, and you are the one person your baby will feel safest around, just your company and smell and warmth, so you are good enough. Don’t doubt yourself because you’re a young twenty something or even thirty something or even younger mum/mum-to-be, time will be there to get to know your baby and what they need, and you will be able to provide for them in ways that suit your environment and what you have.
This was the first step for me on my parenting journey, just realising that I am having a baby, getting rid of my fears and being optimistic about what’s to come as I learn about myself and this soon to be arrival. You’re going into the unknown, but you’ll learn as you go.
Leave a Reply